YOOL TIDE CHEERZ mixed media. © Dec 25th 2011. By Leighton kelly when Santa was bought out by Coca Cola some time back he thought he could sit back on his laurels and enjoy the good life without the pressure of Christmas always looming ahead.  but things went south not far after they day he sold out. of course he was already pretty sick of making toys all year, free from nasty children, living with uppity elves and the biting cold and so he moved to costa rica with his wife ms Clause. that didnt last obviously. he had countless bazillions and he and his wife got the taste for the finer tings which ultimately led to a nasty divorce and a cash settlement that bit far into his initial Coke proceeds.  after the split which was mutual yet bitter Santa tried his hand at a few start up businesses in the gift wrapping and dwarf for hire business. needles to say they didnt pan out due to issues with sporadic spending and human rights activists.  in an alarmingly short time Santa was bankrupt and had to sell his estate on Mal Pais and returned to the north, tho not far, as he disappeared for many years in the beast that is LA. he was seen sporadically on Hollywood boulevard in a drunken stupor shouting at the heavens and begging for change to pay “for daddies medicine”. he again disappeared in the mid 90’s and hasn’t been seen since. his close friends on the street say that he cleaned up his act and has since been living in Alaska in a small yurt doing what he loves. making bicycles and train sets for the local children. our reporters have yet to confirm this report. in any case Christmas has gone off without a hitch since the corporations have taken over and families across the land have rarely been disappointed from the seasons revelries as long as supplies last.  luckily baby Jesus still lives and poops his holey diapers in a small manger made of chocolate and eggnog somewhere in the Midwest holding it all together or else we’d all be fucked. God bless us everyone. (in your face) 

YOOL TIDE CHEERZ

mixed media. © Dec 25th 2011. By Leighton kelly

  • when Santa was bought out by Coca Cola some time back he thought he could sit back on his laurels and enjoy the good life without the pressure of Christmas always looming ahead.  but things went south not far after they day he sold out. of course he was already pretty sick of making toys all year, free from nasty children, living with uppity elves and the biting cold and so he moved to costa rica with his wife ms Clause. that didnt last obviously. he had countless bazillions and he and his wife got the taste for the finer tings which ultimately led to a nasty divorce and a cash settlement that bit far into his initial Coke proceeds.  after the split which was mutual yet bitter Santa tried his hand at a few start up businesses in the gift wrapping and dwarf for hire business. needles to say they didnt pan out due to issues with sporadic spending and human rights activists.  in an alarmingly short time Santa was bankrupt and had to sell his estate on Mal Pais and returned to the north, tho not far, as he disappeared for many years in the beast that is LA. he was seen sporadically on Hollywood boulevard in a drunken stupor shouting at the heavens and begging for change to pay “for daddies medicine”. he again disappeared in the mid 90’s and hasn’t been seen since. his close friends on the street say that he cleaned up his act and has since been living in Alaska in a small yurt doing what he loves. making bicycles and train sets for the local children. our reporters have yet to confirm this report. in any case Christmas has gone off without a hitch since the corporations have taken over and families across the land have rarely been disappointed from the seasons revelries as long as supplies last.  luckily baby Jesus still lives and poops his holey diapers in a small manger made of chocolate and eggnog somewhere in the Midwest holding it all together or else we’d all be fucked. God bless us everyone. (in your face)